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Youth.

by Kalle Mattson

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1.
Once 04:37
Once I was a stranger, a stranger way back then You were wearing a t-shirt, w/ a friend of a friend & I still see you clearly, though the years pass by Once I was a stranger, once upon a time Once I was a dreamer, a dreamer in your eyes I told you all of my secrets, my hopes, my disguise In that borrowed car, under that summer sky Once I was a dreamer, once upon a time But what was lost, just can’t be found Without a trace, without a sound When you said “I’ll see you around” But what was lost, just can’t be found Once I was a killer, a killer without blood & what seemed like everything, soon was never enough & if you think about it, well darling don’t think twice Once I was a killer, once upon a time But what we lost, just can’t be found Without a trace, without a sound When you said “I’ll see you around” But what we lost, just can’t be found Once we were forever, forever in my mind But if something don’t come true is it then a lie? Once I was yours, once you were mine Once we were forever, once upon a time
2.
We are helpless like the setting sun Oh forgive me mother for I have sinned We are broken promises undone Generation of your 90s kids I saw the ocean water Drowning & giving up hope & pay the debts of our fathers Living rich & dying just broke While our hollowed dreams get buried Heroes they never just last It’s all until you get carried It’s all just fading so fast We are the siren sprawl We are the only ones We are the freedom fall Kids on the run We are the holy haul We are the dead & done We are the wonder wall Kids on the run We are breathless like a teenage love Hopped up on prescription pills & TV medicine We are carless christian summer snuff Full of irony & race for relevance I saw the great depression On the streets of my hometown & it leaves a faint impression Somehow keeps letting me down While our hollowed dreams get buried Under piles of plastic trash It’s all until you get carried It’s all just fading so fast
3.
Lie awake in the morning Try to forget the night But it came without warning This empty inside I remember in your parents car Singing “ Baby Its Too Late” Streetlights shining in the dark While time slips away, time slips away & the pieces they fall One young & one blue We’re half of the whole Broken in, broken in two I remember how I held you there Cigarette summer & your yellow hair Feelings far were once so close Where does all your lost love go Oh no, no & the pieces they fall & I wake next to you & I forget it all Broken in, broken in two
4.
Strangers 03:38
I found a picture Of me & you Circa July ’95 Can blood be thicker Than our youth Until the day we die? But nothing stays the same & people never change Every single night I try To find the words to say If I could let it show I would let you know I’d take it all back If you come home Hey stranger Where in the world are you now? Hey stranger Where in the world are you now? I found a movie A super 8 Of broken wedding vows You were a beauty & the same Age as I am now But nothing stays the same & people never change Love can burn out bright Love can fade away If I could let it show I would let you know I’d take it all back If you come home I found a story That I wrote When I was 17 Filled w/ glory & all my hopes Dancing with a dream
5.
Fades Away 04:21
Fading away Tomorrow turns to yesterday & now all that I knew Is a dream not coming true & the lines that we mend A forgotten face, a former friend & my memories of you Are all that’s left to get me through If you try would you remember? That night in September I held you tight, as I drove you home & I swore that I’d never let you go I can’t make you stay Because everything just fades away I won’t make you wait Because everything just fades away Is love ever meant to last? Is the end always written out in the past? I can’t make you stay Because everything just fades away We tried to escape Making due w/ small town fate & if I see you again Could we change, could we pretend When all our time starts to blur A younger you, a younger me Holding on to who we we're Or the thought of who we used to be
6.
In the sun w/ hands held high, a plastic gun Blood on his teeth, a hole in his thumb Gone too soon, taken too young My holy ghost, my only son In the rain Well they say that love always outruns pain While thoughts & prayers march to a flame But I can hear his voice, hear him say my name My holy ghost, my lonely reign If a lamb for slaughter Was treading water He was a wheel If a daylight daughter Was a heart grown hotter He was a heel & you know It lays in light Over my holy ghost Fall & fight Lord they cut his throat Burning bright All of my former hope It lays in light In a riot out on the highway tonight In my daze I saw our names in chalk, a heart worn haze Every memory a minor maze Sunset sighs, an empty gaze My holy ghost, our younger days
7.
When our mothers would still sing us to sleep Before the restlessness had got too deep Nothing lost & nothing won When we were young When all we were was free wasted time Before the innocence had left our eyes Nowhere else & nowhere to run When we were young Now that I am older Well I’ve only grown colder Nervous & hollow Wishing that I could go back now All my friends Are getting drunk & high We pretend Life won’t just pass us by Everyone Deep down knows it’s true Searching for somewhere else, or somebody new When all we’d want was someone love Before none of it was ever enough No one left & no one undone When we were young Now that I am older Well I’ve only grown colder Fearful & shallow Wishing that I could go back now All my friends They can kiss the sky We pretend All of our aimless lies Everyone Deep down knows it’s true Searching for somewhere else, or somebody new
8.
Without You 04:43
Call me in the night & I’ll be there Drive until the light I don’t care & if you’re down well I’ll cut through Because I don’t know just what I’d do Without you We were careless kids, bittersweet I’ve got a little hit for you & me Summer’s fade with September’s blue Those things I said well they all were true Without you, well I never even knew Without you, the darkness shining through Without you, because I don’t know what I’d do Without you, without you From the eastern coast, to the western shore I’ll dance you like a ghost across the kitchen floor Begin again, we could start anew Are you lonely now? Because I’m lonely too Call me in the night if it’s been awhile I’d say that it’s alright just to hear you smile Regrets, well I’ve had a few But the biggest one was me without you
9.
Well I’m writing this now to show you somehow Because lord it won’t leave my lungs It’s 4:25 on a Sunday night Motel sunset drunk I heard you’re now living down south & that’s where you’ll probably stay It’s a beautiful fake, & a ripple in the wake You hated the cold anyway But I hope you don’t mind me stalling Because nothing is simple anymore I’m a poem you penned, a stranger to a friend A tourist in the town I was born & are you still out there waiting? Wishing on what might have been Because we were the ones that we never could find again Running against the wind It’s a tangled vignette that I thought you’d forget As the memories turn to blue Falling asleep under the quiet TV Under a blanket handed down to you Driving down stars in your parents used car Circle the streets of our hometown But we were bittersweet & incomplete & always just dragging you down But now it comes in so clearly Because I never just saw the light When I came home the house was dark You were turned away alone on your side & are you still out there waiting? Wondering where & when Because we were the ones that we never could find again Running against the wind & I followed the plan but I can’t understand Why love is such a fleeting thing I was a cynical saint, w/ blindfold faith Held the world out on a string But seasons still change through the passing of age By morning this all will seem More than just this, more than just to exist So close & so far out of reach & Sarah I’m awake & I’m grasping Because I never know what to believe Is there something more than to die in the room we were born Alone thinking about you & me Because I’ll always be out here waiting For you to come on & come in Because we were the ones that we never could find again Running against the wind
10.
Astronaut. 04:22
I never was an astronaut floating out in space & I never made the big leagues, & I never went to Spain But is time just a lie so every dream comes true? Because someone said every regret is something you never do I never was an actor, never finished what I begin & I never even asked her, never saw what might have been But is love just a game that I’m too scared to lose? Because someone said every regret is something you never do Born to die or born to run Born to lie alone, like father like son But I won’t trade it in the end To go back again I never could remember every little grudge & I never should have even cared but I never stayed in touch But if the future’s what we change, but the past is what we’d choose Because someone said every regret is something you never do But to die or born to run Born to lie alone, like father, like son Younger now but I was younger then Born to live & born to love Born in time tonight & on the cusp But I won’t trade it in the end To go back again I never went to see you on the day that you died & I never saw you smile again & I never said goodbye But when everything is gone will we come back anew? Because once you said every regret is something you never do

about

‘Youth.’ is a coming of age album. It’s about when your dreams becomes your regrets, when your friends become strangers, & when your first love becomes your first loss. I really hope you like it.❤️
- KM.

credits

released September 7, 2018

Produced by Colin Munroe
Mixed by Noah Georgeson
Mastered by Philip Shaw Bova
Recorded in Los Angeles, Vancouver, Toronto, Ottawa & Sault Ste. Marie

Tracks 1, 6, 10 words & music by Kalle Mattson
Tracks 2, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9 words & music by Kalle Mattson & Colin Munroe
Track 3 words & music by Kalle Mattson, Colin Munroe & Frank Deresti
 
Kalle Mattson - Vocals, Guitars, Synths
Colin Munroe - Vocals, Guitars, Piano, Programming, Synths
Jim Bryson – Vocals, Guitars, Synths
Vince Aquilina – Drums, Percussion
Andrew Sowka – Bass (Tracks 1, 2, 4, 5, 8, 9)
JF Beauchamp - Trumpet, Flugelhorn (Tracks 7, 8, 9)
Phil Charbonneau - Bass (Tracks 2, 7)
Frank Deresti - Banjo, Ukulele (Tracks 8, 10)
Josh Norling - Saxophone (Tracks 6, 8)

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Kalle Mattson Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario

Kalle Mattson is a Juno & Polaris Music Prize nominated singer/songwriter based in Canada.

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